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Monday, June 6, 2016

Ultimate Guide To Become A Failure

Here are some simple steps that will help you become a failure, yes you read it right these are some simple ways/ actions/ inactions that will lead you to the path of failure.  Why is it important to know this? Because knowingly or unknowlingly you may have started on a path of failure and it is better to know it now than knowing it when it is too late to make any course correction.

Avoid walking/ jogging or doing any physical exercise. Yes, this will help you become lazy and lathargic. Continue to tell yourself every morning that you will start going for a walk from the next day/ next week, repeat this every day with some excuse or another. It is really very very simple and it works.

Practice procrastination. This is your habit of deferring or postponing important tasks to a later time/ day and completing the less important tasks first. Take pleasure in completing the task which is neither urgent nor important. Push all the important tasks to some other time/ day unless the important tasks become urgent. Now, complete it just in time and pat your back.

Stop learning. This is another great way to become mediocre in life. Think of yourself as someone who is successful and knows everything. Don't learn new skills/ don't attend trainings/ skill upgrade programs, this will ensure that you become replaceable/ outdated. Very soon you will loose all your importance and will be thrown out.

Hold on to the same job or years and years. This goes hand in hand with the point above. Don't share your knowledge with anyone. Don't create your replacement/ backup. This will ensure that you do the same job for many years and never grow. One fine day with the advent of new technology you and  your job both become stale.

Blame others. For any setbacks or failures, develop a habit to find fault with others. Never accept your mistake nor learn any lessons. Always find someone to be blamed. This will help you continue the same mistake again and fail continuously.

Kill your time doing "Nothing". Tried of watching the same movies over and over again on TV? Why not switch to The Internet? Here you can spend hours and hours of your time doing "nothing". Don't forget to be online late in the night, either watching youtube videos or just scrolling facebook. This will ensure you don't get enough sleep. Wake up late in the morning/ be late for office. It will also ensure that you feel sleepy during the daytime and you can blame it all on the stress created by modern day jobs.

Engage in gossiping. Never lose an opportunity to talk ill of others. Always condemn, criticize and complain about people, process and situations. This will help you build a very negative aura around yourself and ensure that you are extremely unpopular.

Be laid back. Never take any initiative and always think that you have a very bad luck. Term every successful person as "Lucky". Having no faith in hardwork will also help.

Hang out with the likeminded failures. Firmly believe in your own ability to find like minded people. Be sure that you will find super failures around you. Find them and become friends with them. Hang out with them and tell each other how selfish and unfair the world is.

Be disorganized. This habit will help you ensure that you never succeed. Never respect time, timelines and deadlines. Be always late for your school, meetings and/ or any other funtions. Never deliver any project on time.

Take random advice. Never believe in the advice given by your parents/ experienced people. Always follow random advice given by random people whom you cannot trust.

Never learn from your mistakes. Always ignore the lessons learned from the failures in past and continue to make the same mistakes again.

Don't believe in the power of positive thinking. Always surround yourself with negative thoughts. Doubt your ability to succeed and avoid trying just because you may fail. And yes, don't forget to stop yourself by thinking about 'What others will think if you dream BIG?'

Don't learn how to collaborate. Never make an attempt to learn or improve your written and spoken english skills. Tell yourself that communication and collaboration skills are not at all important.

Last but not the least, never learn how to manage your personal finance. This is the last thing you need to do to embark on the path of failure.

Now, this is one hell of a negative list, isn't it? Ofcourse if it is. The degree of failure depends on how many of these factors one brings into practice. Chances of failure increase with each practice. The reason why these are mentioned in a sarcastic way is to make ourselves understand that getting better is not only important but also urgent. With each small failure we push ourselves away from success. Ignorance or inaction may prove costly and ultimately result in failure. It's time to wake up. Take responsibility for your own success, look into the eyes of failure and defeat it. Do It Now.

If you are more than 13 years old then you will definitely like to read ...
Why Say Sorry When You Can Say Thank You

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